23 years as a FinDom. https://queenfaev.com/my-links
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You can find all my links here. https://queenfaev.compay Methods onlyhttps://queenfaev.com/my-linksI... View more
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I have been in the BDSM world since May of 2000. I started out for one year as a submissive to learn... View more
Queenfaev
posted a blog.
December 8, 2023
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Findom, short for financial domination, is a unique aspect of BDSM that involves a power exchange centered around financial control. In this blog post, we will delve into the dynamics of safe findom, examining the principles of consent, trust, and responsible execution. We will explore how findom can be an empowering experience for both dominants and submissives while highlighting the significance of maintaining boundaries and ensuring the well-being of all participants. Join us on this journey as we unravel the complexities of safe findom and its potential for personal growth and fulfillment.
Findom or Financial Domination is the activity of a submissive giving gifts, money and financial control to a Financial Dominant. The financial dominant traditionally does end up with a higher annual income than the submissive therefore making them dominant. She should know how to multiply her own income and not depend on submissives as this makes her position more in control.
A power exchange, a negotiated exchange of power between partners, is also closely related to Findom. A mistress for example will control the finances of a submissive. Down to what he spends and what bills he may pay. This type of extreme should only be handled by people who know how to manage money. A submissive can not serve long term if a Mistress takes all of his money and does not pay for his needs (clothing, food, shelter).
To establish safe findom practices it is important to communicate all bills, needs, and management of funds. Make sure you know what you want so spend on her and what you must save for your own monthly expenses. This isn't always necessary for the lighter versions of this fetish but for the extremes it is vital. Keep a line of open communication in order to keep the dynamic healthy and long-term.
Negotiating Financial Expectations are also very important. If you don't go into detail about this then a long dynamic will not happen. There must be a budget for what type of dynamic you want to go to. Some may only afford $100 a month...while others can easily spend around $2000+ for a high-quality service. And yes it is a service. This means you both have to match with fetishes. Keep in mind some do not offer this and that is also ok. Just know what you are both interested in.
Trust and Responsibility can not be stressed enough. With this fetish being flooded with more and more who do not understand that there are responsibilities involved. A sub has to make sure his bills are paid. While a dominant needs to pay attention to a subs health. Mental as well and physical and emotional in order to hold a longer hold. Realize that more dynamics are not long term. They want a quick tip or gift and move on to the next. Those are easy to id.
Building and Maintaining Trust revolves around open communication and ongoing negotiations. What is going on in both your lives? What bills have come up? Is there something like a vacation or project you want to be funded? Is there heating or gas cost gone up? These are things that you need to know. Trust takes time to build as well as understanding. Is the submissive working hard for your interests or are they just draining all your energy for their own needs.
There are responsibilities and duties of care that need to be outlined from the start. Some submissives enjoy a life of micro-management. This requires a lot of time from a Mistress to care for. Or is this a low-maintenance situation where a Mistress will demand an amount for a game or a twitter promotion? There are things to consider.
Self-Care and Emotional Well-being: Do you both have care kits there is a thing called sub and dom drops. Do you know what makes you feel good when you are low on energy? Use this in your kit. Do you both have limits? What are they and have they been defined?
Recognizing Emotional Boundaries: Again referring to boundaries. What are you willing to no and not willing to do? Why? Are there triggers that are too much for you? Be honest with this as these can really be a problem later on.
Aftercare and Support are not discussed often enough. These are things like regular breaks offline. For me I will take a walk around the pond I live close to when I have too much going on. I will read a book or grab a warm soft blanket and a mug of hot chocolate and write out how I am feeling in a journal. Sometimes I will light a scented candle and enjoy a nice bubble bath. These are the small things that can be done. A regular check-in with my sub is also a necessary involvement. I know how they are doing and how far they still want to take this and it means I have a steady income in which I invest in other things to make sure when I have low-income months from working I still have bills paid.
Evolution and Growth in an options as well. Think of it from the Mistress's perspective. If you encourage a hard-working sub to go to school or take courses that will in the end mean his income goes up that means there is more room for you as well. Also, are you looking into ways that you can invest that extra income for your own growth? Management of social media? Finance courses so you know where your tax dollars can be deduced? What about the deligation of editing videos or photos?
Safe findom is a dynamic and complex aspect of BDSM that requires a thorough understanding of consent, trust, and responsible practices. By establishing open communication, maintaining boundaries, and prioritizing emotional well-being, findom can become a powerful tool for personal growth, empowerment, and mutually fulfilling experiences. Remember, safety and consent should always be the guiding principles in any BDSM practice, including findom.
Note: I realized that I posted the outline and not the actual post which is why it has been edited. If you wish to follow me on other links you can find them on my website.
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