I love every damn thing about it. I love that first drain experience of a new sub. I love the relapsed addict that can't stay away no matter how hard he fights his cravings, the lifer who has spent thousands who doesn't dare count his total. The self loathing automaton who can't feel anything until he's taking direction and being used the way only I know how. I even love the timewasters who keep my skills polished and remind me just how wonderfully amazing the real subs are.
I love the seduction and tease of what might be or is yet to come. I love the game of wits, of truth or dare that we play. I love the lifestyle, and extravagant spending on things I don't really need, like or want just to see them go to the any extreme to please me. Hungerly watching them give me their last bit of what's left of their monetary or self value and doing it willingly.
There is nothing on Earth that can allow me the openness and freedom to be who I am with no shame, no guilt, no grief or fear of circumstance. I love the sacrifice, the extra mile, the pushed envelope that comes my way. There is no other feeling or rush knowing the conflict that is in a sub's heart and mind when they are fighting themselves to hit send and the inevitable spendgasm that only I can give.
