To be, or not to be...a sub

Recently I have come across a number of boys who are not quite sure if this lifestyle is for them.  They feel as if they are submissive, but they are not quite sure that they can or want to, commit to an actual life of being a slave or Paypig. They are worried that it will change their vanilla life or do away with it completely, and they are torn between the two ways of life. Some might think it’s an easy decision, however, for these boys, it’s a hard choice, and they are living in limbo, which is hell on them.

If someone is submissive, they are submissive, but in many cases, they have to hide their submission due to their job, their family, and the lifestyle they are living at the moment. It’s like a person hiding their sexuality and not being able to “come out of the closet.” The problem with being submissive and having the desire to serve is that, even though it can be suppressed, it will never go away. I explain this lifestyle to people in this way. It is an actual need, desire, and craving. Unlike when someone craves a pizza, they order it, pick it up, and eat until they are satisfied, this lifestyle doesn’t work that way. The sub has a hole inside of them, that craves and desires submission, however, the more they serve, the more they are dominated, the bigger the hole gets. The craving never goes away. There is never enough service to satisfy them. They are at their happiest serving, because their need, and craving, are constantly being fed.

For those that have girl/boy/friends, wives, or husbands, the decision to serve can be a hard one. How can you satisfy two people, make the two of them the most important people in your life, without them finding out about your Goddess? How do you serve to the fullest while trying to be a “man” with the other? And what about having to give up the life of being able to go out with friends, etc? These are the things that are running through the minds of these boys. What to do, what to do, when on one hand they really want to serve, but on the other hand they don’t want to, or can’t, give up their vanilla life. It’s a very hard choice for some.

When these boys tell me they are “stuck between two worlds”, I tell them this. First and foremost, they must see which one of these lifestyles really touches their soul, and which one really calls out to them. If it is to be submissive and serve, then they need to find the right Goddess, one that is willing to work with them through their vanilla life. I have quite a few married subs, and I never do anything to break up their relationship, in fact, there are times I actually help them to make it better. Finding the right Goddess is key. Even when my boy is married and has a family, everything is worked out so that nothing is taken away from the family, yet Goddess is still served and is a very important part of boy’s life. Boy is able to satisfy both parts of his life. Sure there are things that boy would like to do, but, due to his situation cannot, but they are replaced by other things that allow boy to still serve and feel as if boy is owned.

Now, to the boys that choose the vanilla life, to them, I say “take yourself off the site.” Why would you want to tease yourself by peeking into a window, to watch a party that you aren’t going to attend? Why would you want to watch others live a life that you have already decided you cannot participate in? Are you hoping that one day you will see something that will change your mind? And if so, what could actually change your mind?

I guess the moral of this story is if a boy wants to actively participate in this lifestyle, but also wants to have a vanilla life, boy needs to find the right Goddess who will work with boy through both. I have boys in my stable that do both and it is a win/win for both of us. Find the right Goddess and boy may not have to stand outside looking in anymore, boy will finally be able to scratch that unreachable and persistent, itch. I wish all of you boys the best.