life of a kitten part 1

The life of a kitten, part 1

My Goddess has given me the task of documenting how I came to the fetish world in general, moved on to Findom and ultimately took up position at Her feet.  I would like to thank Her for this opportunity.

My first encounter with the fetish world came very early on in life, although I did not know at the time what it was called.  Growing up, there was a British TV program called the Avengers, it was the precursor to James Bond.

This program always had the female agent being captured, bound and gagged in some form and upon seeing this, I became interested as well as aroused.  The more I watched, the more I wanted to see what it was like to be bound like her.  I began to tie and gag myself when no one was around and I must admit, I liked how it felt.

As I grew older, I discovered Detective magazines in the candy store, (yes this was before the internet and was the only way to view this type of material).  I learned that what was happening to the female was called bondage, and began to identify with the one being bound.  I still did not know that I was submissive, but I knew that I enjoyed being tied up.

I began to look for bondage photos and websites, exploring what they had to offer.  I still had no experience with a Domme or Mistress, heck, I didn’t even know what they were.  The more I saw of this type of porn, the more I wanted to experience it and go deeper.

I didn’t know there was a community dedicated to this until later in life when i found the online game Second Life.  There, the bondage world opened up to me and I began to explore my fantasies and unlock my submissive side.  There were some nice Dommes who taught me how to behave and interact with others as a submissive, but there were others who were out right nasty and mean.  I discovered that I was a submissive who enjoyed bondage and being shown off for my Domme’s pleasure.  As is the case with online games and relationships, some folks take these things more seriously than others and as a result, I had several “Owners”.

As this world unfolded, I discovered a Domme who was into Findom and the thought of that peaked my curiosity.  To give something that is mine over to someone else for their pleasure seemed very erotic.  It started out giving money for photos of Her (which I later discovered weren’t of Her but a friend), then for items in the game.  All of this was very sexy, but had no real structure and was soon getting out of hand and was making me question what the heck I was doing? 

At this same time, I met a Domme who would later become my Goddess and true owner.  We talked and before long I found myself kneeling at Her feet.  The relationship started as any, talking about each-others fantasies, what we were looking for in this kind of relationship and before long, I was wearing Her collar in the game. 

As time went by, I was giving up more and more control of my life to Goddess.  She eventually sent a cock ring for me to wear daily as a sign of Her ownership and control over me, which I still wear proudly years later.  Soon, I was paying for manicures, pedicures, groceries, and more. 

As Goddess mentioned in Her blog, I did run away, back to a former Findom. I was going through some trying times in life and thought that this was the solution.  The more I thought about what I did, the more I realized the mistake I made and how much I missed Goddess.

I begged and crawled back to Goddess and was fortunate that She took me back. I have learned that Goddess cares for me as a person (as I do for Her), yes that can be done in a D/s relationship, we talk about real life problems we are going through and are there for each other as people.

I love and trust Goddess completely, so much so that we are linked via PayPal, and I even added Goddess as a user on two of my credit cards.  I still get such a thrill from seeing Goddess use me for Her pleasure, seeing the PayPal notification, the charge on the credit card bill that is Hers, or being made to beg for the privilege of giving money over to Her. 

I dream about Goddess almost nightly and crave for new ways to submit and please Her.  I wish I could turn over all I have to Her, but that is not practical at this moment, but we find other ways for me to submit to Her control.

We are on a journey that I have no idea where it will lead.  Currently, I am being trained to be a sissy, wearing panties for Her pleasure, something I would not have even considered prior to meeting Goddess, but now I beg to do.

I believe that is all for now, with more to come I am sure.  Once again, I want to thank Goddess for this opportunity to share my story with E/everyone.