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I will take what I post this morning straight from my Fetlife blog because I think it should also be shared with the community here. Remember ladies it does not make you less dominant to take care of your subs and care about them.
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It has been a long time since I took the time to post things here. Mainly due to time. I have been busy educating people on Twitter about being Dominant.
See I have the experience because I was introduced to the kink in 2000 as a sub. My mentor told me that the only want to master this world was to learn from both sides. So I had to start from the very bottom as one of his servants in his home. Within six months I had worked hard enough at showing him I could serve him and what he needed of me without thinking of myself. Lessons were taught every single day.
I had to learn to juggle my life as a single mother of one child (at the time (pregnant with another) with the money he provided she was well taken care of in the houses that I lived. While she was in school my time was spent serving my mentor. When she was home she was my responsibility. My mentor took me in because he knew I needed help picking a better path in life.
When we decided it was time for me to start training as a dominant after an incident that proved I was a natural dominant. Life changed drastically, I learned that even when things are handed to you, you still must work to keep them.
Even now it has been 18 years in this BDSM world those lessons still ring true. I try to pay it forward in the ways I was taught. By offering the knowledge I have to the submissive people that chose to submit to me. I also chose to stay true to me. That means that in sessions with me and serving me I am a strict Domme.
I expect my orders to be followed and punishment dealt so that lessons are learned. At the same time, I care about my long term submissives. I keep secrets I follow rules just as they do. Meaning my subs know I am safe, sane and fair.
I believe in this day in age being what I am (Lifestyle Financial Female Dominant) is looked down upon because of the trend that turned Financial Domination into a get rich quick scheme. It makes my blood boil just as it does so many other BDSM people. However, it will not stop me from staying true to who I am.
Yes, money feeds my need to control. It turns me on and no it isn't the amount. It is the pure selfless act of giving me that power. Knowing they value me and my work. That is what it means to me.
And if the money being involved bothers you, serve another. I am not here for everyone. I am here for the ones who see me at the value that I am. Who chose to submit to me.
Never once have I forced something to submit and nor do I intend to."
Here is a link to a few posts on my Twitter.
PJ and how I treated him:
https://twitter.com/queenfaev/status/1097892079504633856
My Slut PayPig:
https://twitter.com/queenfaev/status/1099266828285693955
https://twitter.com/queenfaev/status/1099264139107684352
In the end, it boils down to learning your style, learn your sub, and improving the bond. Remember to succeed there must be a balance between giving and taking on both parties.