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As I am sure you can imagine I get asked for advice a LOT from new and up and coming Dommes who are trying to break into the online Findom scene. I like most Dommes I meet tbh (at least as acquaintances anyways) and always wish them best of luck. Findom can be hard to have success in and the whole scene can be discouraging at times to anyone not having the results they crave. Many Dommes also write Me to ask if I will be their Mentor. This is of course very flattering, but I do not really have the time for true mentorship like I think they are hoping for, so I always decline. Even though I'm not willing/able to mentor others, I DO like helping in the ways I am able. Sometimes the best way is giving a little advice here and there when I have the time. So I thought I might show some of the advice that I have given to others who asked for My help. This way maybe the advice gets seen by more of those who would be asking since I know they're out there!
The following is MY RESPONSE to a message that was sent to Me on fetlife by a new Findomme. She asked for mentorship or any help I could offer her. I am not posting her original message to Me out of respect for certain details she included in her message. The message that follows was My response to her request for help/advice/mentorship etc and has a few good tidbits of advice that might help another Domme. Enjoy:
Hi there, nice to meet you!
Unfortunately I am not really in a position to mentor anyone because of the time factor. Not to mention I am always learning and growing myself.
The good news is, you don't really need a mentor. Street smarts and the love of "hustle" (I don't mean in the sense of being a scam artist or anything like that; I mean in the sense of like taking it upon yourself to get what you want in life etc) will take you very far in this.
A few pieces of general advice that might help hopefully:
1)Make sure you focus on the BDSM and fetish end of domination because there is much less interest in Dommes who do not since this IS a bdsm thing. Most subs will avoid a Domme whose ONLY fetish or dominant interest is findom because it looks like they're not actually a Domme, just more of a lady who likes gifts and money-which is after all, ALL women technically lol. Findom being a control and power exchange/bdsm thing means the findommes will in theory have an interest in those things outside of money. So make sure to put effort into that area of thought.
2) As far as meeting boys online you MUST promote yourself in some way to have best chances in the online world. There are a LOT of findommes and the boys have a limited amount of tribute money to spend usually. They will not give it to any random person who walks up to them and asks. And like most men, subs like to find a woman who interests them and kind of pursue or court her. How will they know any of us exist in the 1st place in the HUGE and expanding world of findom? You will need to find a way to make your presence known and show how special you are for them to feel your pull and want to tribute you. So put your efforts THERE and they will follow hopefully.
3) Be yourself. if you are being anyone else then they can just go pay THAT person. Be YOU. you are special and unique and the finsubs respect that, generally speaking.
BEST OF LUCK!
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