What, No Cam Sessions?!

(This blog may be shocking to some of you.  I apologize in advance  :)  Also no criticism or judgment is intended of any other member who may enjoy some of the things I will be writing about.)

If you have read my previous blogs, you will know that I am lucky enough to have the awesome Miss Dakota as my Goddess.  She does not do Cam sessions and I am absolutely fine with that.

When we first started communicating one of the first subjects She talked about was expectations as regards Cam sessions.  She wanted to be clear that Cam is not something She generally does except MAYBE as a reward.

I immediately replied that I really didn’t like Cam sessions at all.  I wasn’t interested in “performing” on Cam and I most certainly did not expect Her to perform on Cam for me.  I sent that message with a little trepidation as I wasn’t certain how She would react.  I need not have been concerned as She was delighted with my response!  From that point on I think both Miss Dakota and I realized that THIS was going to be perfect (and 6 weeks later, it has been!) :)

Prior to being with Miss Dakota I have had some instances of Domme’s assuming that I would love a Cam session with them.  Last year I was having quite a lengthy communication with a Domme from here (She is no longer here, to my knowledge) and I had pleased Her quite a bit so one day She said She was going to “reward” me with a Cam session.  I went very quiet wondering how to respond.  Eventually I found some words which amounted to “Thanks but no thanks” much to Her surprise.  I tried to explain how i felt but i'm not sure she really understood.

So, I think I need to try to answer why I don’t like or want Cam sessions.

One reason is that I am more than a bit on the shy and reserved side.  I have to really like and trust someone to let them through my walls.  I feel protected in text but would feel exposed on camera.  I don’t have any desires for humiliation either so asking me to do something in that line is not something I am going to enjoy on any level.

But really, the main reason is that I believe the most potent sexual organ is the brain.  My brain takes the text messages and the beautiful seductive images of Miss Dakota and my imagination fills in the rest and I love what rolls around in my head.  I don’t need to see Miss Dakota on live camera to know how amazing She is, how easily She controls me, and I already know how drop-dead gorgeous She is (still pinch myself every day that She enjoys me so much – I keep saying to myself, “don’t screw this up, don’t screw this up”!).

My wish is to have an ever-stronger emotional connection to my Goddess.  Cam sessions wouldn’t do that for me.  I feel that what strengthens our connection is our daily contact and having interesting conversations that often are not kink related (gasp!).  Learning more about Miss Dakota and what is happening in Her world brings me closer to Her.  Doing things for Her and with Her makes our link stronger, bringing a stability to our relationship that I need very much.  This past weekend was such fun for me, and I very much hope for Her too.  On Saturday we watched hilarious Youtube videos and then on Sunday we worked on an art project together (something WAY out of my comfort zone, but with Miss Dakota to guidance, it was successful!). 

I keep on discovering more layers to my beautiful, super-talented Goddess and I love every moment I get to spend with Her.  I am endlessly fascinated by Her and I can’t (and don’t want to) imagine life without Her.

No cam session needed!