Memory Lane

One of the things Miss Dakota asked me to write about in my blog posts is “Past Experiences”.  So here goes…..

I have had submissive feelings for as long as I can remember.  I don’t regard myself as “old” but it’s hard to escape the fact that I have been around a while J  So it’s been a long time…..before there was access to the internet.

So before the internet we had magazines, lovely glossy magazines which I acquired mostly in a rather shady looking place in London (I’m from England and worked in London for a time) where I had to go down to the basement to find the good stuff – a couple of examples:

All rather furtive and ultimately never totally satisfying but certainly fed my fantasies J

Then in 1992 (I think) I bought my first proper computer and a few years later I got my first internet access.  Of course, it wasn’t long till I was searching for “Femdom” (no Google then!)  J   Eventually, I discovered IRC (Internet Relay Chat), it’s still around if you look hard enough.  A truly wondrous communication method (text only) and it took a while to learn but I ended up in a channel called #Amazons.  For the first time I realized I was far from the only submissive in the world and yes, there really were real Dominant Women; not just in fantasies.

The channel had very firm rules for subs as I recall – no idle lurking allowed!  It was a requirement to offer service to the Domme’s in attendance – there were very elaborate serving rituals limited only by the imagination.  This all allowed subs to demonstrate to Domme’s their willingness to serve and their ability to string more than a few sentences together.  Personally, I miss that kind of structure – but those days seem to be long gone.   I spent hours at a time in this place – on the weekend, all nighters were not unusual.

Eventually, I ended up collared by a wonderful Domme (who happened to live in Florida) in this channel and I was with Her for quite a while (over a year if I recall).  We would spend so much time chatting together and I was able to speak to Her on the phone from time to time (when She was at work – She was married with two daughters She called the mini Domme’s J)

Strange to think that this was all before Amazon wish lists and such things.  There were no gifts or tributes though I did send Her flowers to Her one time I remember – at which She was both delighted and a little mad….lol

In the summer of 1998, I was able to take a vacation for my first visit to Florida (little did I know I would end up living there!) and I met Her!  She had set me up in a little cabin by the beach.  She had to work a lot of the time but I would meet Her for lunch and we spent time when She could in the cabin and then one weekend I stayed with Her from the Friday evening to Sunday afternoon.  With Her was my first real life submissive experience and I don’t think I’ll ever forget it!  She violated me in a way that was amazing and She made me feel so incredibly submissive and docile for Her.  It was all wonderful but also tearful (for me anyway) when it all had to come to an end.

Sadly, it all ended shortly afterwards when I discovered after I got home She had been quite deceptive with me.  Took me a long time to get over that but then the following year I met my (now ex) wife…. but that’s a whole other story! J